Where to now?

"Get a job. Go to work. Get married. Have children. Follow fashion. Act normal. Walk on the pavement. Watch TV. Obey the law. Save for old age.
Now repeat after me: I AM FREE!"

Society is so full of prejudice. What's considered right or wrong, whats considered normal or not. There is so much pressure on people to spend their whole lives working their asses off instead of enjoying life. People who think differently and would rather enjoy their lives are looked down upon and as hippies or weirdos. It's so crazy to actually think how fucked society has become.

People don't like change.

And in any case, who is going to change things? Most people are just concerned about their own well being (and the well being of their loved ones) to take any action.

Of course, one could argue the power of the people (banding together, protesting and such). It has worked, in some cases. But, I have also noticed a lot of movements that eventually lost its power (and its following).

Unless a great leader arises among us...nothing is going to change. And it terrifies the shit out of me!!!

Why cant we get past racism...when we know that we all came from the same place. We know that our skin color is a result of migration and climate but..."I hate you because you look different"? Its a shame we're still stuck in this type of thinking. 

Why does life seem to be all about how much money you have? How come you can't enjoy life, learning and discovering things about yourself, sharing with people, and loving one another? Why do you have to 1up another person to make yourself feel happy? 

Why are there people influencing us to make decisions that will ultimately make them rich? I mean, really large companies are creating items while working with psychologist and marketers, hoping to keep you dumb enough to buy their product. How come people aren't more focused on reaching high academic heights? The world would be a better place. 

Why are we still fighting over man-made religion? We know that humans created religion out of ignorance and geology...is it because it keeps the average man in a box? Is it easier to rule and control? 

How come people are dying of AIDS and how come people are still poor? I mean Africa is one of the hottest places on Earth...you'd think they'd have the best Solar energy development in the world. Instead...people are still dying of low energy. There isn't enough energy to power homes and hospitals? 

Why are we facing a nuclear situation in life that makes us smile in the face of our enemies? The arms race will only destroy us in the end. 

War. People justify murder during such times as acts of desperation. It's still murder. The murder would be completely unnecessary if bad people weren't put into positions of power, and if people didn't feel the need to divide territories and define ownership over them. 

People can be terrible. There's cold blooded killers, thieves, etc. There's people who rape, and the equally absolutely terrible people who make false claims of rape. Luckily, there are a few genuinely good folks sprinkled in here and there, and perhaps you'll meet them. 

Truth be told...we as a Human race are at a stage in our civilization that we should know how to be perpetually happier than we actually are. We possess the smarts and human know-how. We possess the technology and man power...but we are stuck in a world were people fight over land and money and power. WHY?

People are in denial. They are too scared to acknowledge the true source of this society’s rampant "insanity". Most people have been coerced and manipulated into a state of what anarchist political prisoner, Rob ‘los Ricos’ Thaxton, calls "imposed imbecility". The institutions of the state and capital enforce this. Schools, prisons, work, the police, social service programs, and the corporate mass media all contribute to this incredible brain-washing scheme. They force us to depend upon them. They tell us that the way we live today is the best way to live. They tell us that we have reached the pinnacle of human existence - the height of civilization. They tell us that there is no alternative. We must obey. 

I am free. Yeah, right!

Wake up!!!

My New Year's Resolution

Every New Year, people have the urge to make their New Year's resolutions. Promises that they will tend to fulfill in the year to come. Resolutions. Promises. Wishful thinking. That you will work on yourself to become a better person. To exercise more. To read more. To go out more. To pay more attention to your own needs and not care as much for what people say. Go travel. Buy something expensive.

Take a moment and think about your New Year's resolution. Did you make one? What did you promise to yourself? Have you started working towards it? Or did you forget it already? Each year we say we’ll start doing this, or stop doing that. But more often than not our big plans get dashed sometime in January. Whatever the case, I present you MY New Year's resolution for you. 

1. Forgive and forget. Most possibly one of the best pieces of advice I have ever read. Don't hold grudges. Whatever happened, happened and no amount of time spent on analyzing and grudging will make you feel better. Let it go. The more you think about it, the more negative thoughts fill your brain and you end up not being happy. In a year from now, that little thing that seems so important, won't even cross your mind. Then why stress about it? Just don't. Eventually, if it is something someone did to you that hurt you, take it as a lesson and move on. Forgive and forget.

2. Be honest. To yourself. This is the best policy you might incorporate in your life. Don't just lie to yourself. Do I really want this? Will it make me happy? Is it necessary? Will it make me feel bad? Will it add value to my life?

3. Make a difference. I tend to do small acts on a daily basis to brighten up someone's day. A simple note on a colleague's desk. A text sent to a friend's cell phone. Well-hearted wish for someone's special occasion. Buying chocolate for someone. Buying/picking flower and giving it as a gift. No reason needed. Just for the heck of it. Compliment someone. On their eyes. On their smile. On their passion. On their strength. They'll appreciate it. You know the saying: Maybe it won't make a difference to the whole world, but it will, for sure make a difference in that person's world. The best part is that it will make YOU feel great. Noble. 

4. Find your passion and follow it. Whatever this is, make the most out of it. Fill your free time working on it, developing it, molding it. Make it flow through you, it will attract even bigger passion. For life. 

5. Don't hate. Hate is a way too strong word for you to have in your vocabulary. You might not like something/someone, but don't hate. You don't want to disperse that kind of energy in the universe. You know how they say that dogs can smell the fear in people? Well, it's the same with people. They sense when someone's filled with hate. It is not a good vibe. 

6. Work on yourself. Get in the best shape you can. Physically, mentally, spiritually. Set apart a time in the day or the week when you will have a few moments to improve yourself in any given way. It will make you feel proud of yourself, boost your ego and make you love yourself more. People care about people who care about themselves.

7. Go on adventures. Go to the concert of a local band you have never heard or have a water balloon fight at 2 a.m, or go to a new restaurant you've been wanting to go to, and stop falling into the idea that you have to be traveling or have a lot of money to have incredible adventures and make your life mean something.

8. Read. Read a lot. Novels, poems, blog posts, people's opinion on music, food, social responsibility, politics. Whatever grinds your gears. Just read. Enrich your vocabulary. Broaden your horizon. See a new point of view. 

9. Love more. And express your feelings. You like someone, let them know. You love someone - it is imperative that you tell them. Let people know what you love. The smell of fresh baked cookies. The smell of freshly cut grass. The sound of a river softly running down. The taste of the new chewing gum. Love someone's laughter? Tell them. Love more. 

10. Smile more. Spread da joy. People love you.

11. Whatever you decide, don't ever give up. No matter how many times you fail, there is still a new day coming, a new sunrise to be watched, a new coffee to be drank, a new challenge to be achieved. If you can imagine it, you can do it.

12. Be you. You were molded the way you are today by your own fights. The scars that you carry are a proof that you fought and won. Or failed and learned. You were born an original. Don't fade away as a fake copy. Let your light shine. It will light up someone's day, I promise.

13. Remember:

Happy New Year, my dear friends. May all of you go through with your New Year's resolutions. Wishing for all of you that this year ends being ridiculously amazing.  

Over and out,

Tanya Jones

Her eyes...

I fall in love thousand times a day. I fall in love so easily, so freely, so innocently. Be it my first morning coffee, or the soft brisk of fresh air, the little child that smiled at me or the cat that followed me home and all she wanted was to pet her. I fall in love with beautiful eyes of a stranger that unintentionally looked my way. I fall in love with the smile of the people, their soft way of walking, their hair. Most of all, I fall in love with a beautiful soul.

A few nights ago, two bottles of a fine red wine were the gateway that led me to meeting a beautiful soul once again. A beautiful creature with the most magnetizing eyes. I have met her before. So many years ago. A persona of my past, carved in my memory as the most innocent little creature with the most beautiful eyes. Two-lined chit-chat was enough for reacquainting her hypnosis. Yes, I am talking about a woman. Met her as a girl, got reacquainted to a woman. Still beautiful, still the same magnetizing smile, aura-pure kindness. But, her eyes... her eyes were telling a different story. A sad story.

Remembering moments of our past, when our paths crossed for a short period of time, retelling the stories of our foolishness, bringing up talks and feelings that are now ancient history. Glass by glass, word by word, story by story, we came to a point where we needed to fill in the blanks of our fading away years. So much pain and so many tears and so many screams for help. She was pouring her soul out, to the very last drip of it. The story her eyes tell. The story of a broken soul.

The person I once knew as the innocent little girl with the beautiful eyes was now a broken soul. What struck me the most was the pain in her eyes. Her pain, and yet, somehow, they still had the little innocent spark in them. The casual drink turned into a night out. As soon as we walked into the bar, five guys approached her. I am not exaggerating. And those weren't the only ones. Her presence was a shining light in the middle of the overcrowded place. Amongst all the alcohol and cigarette smoke, her face grimaced the amount of wine in her blood stream, yet she was stunningly magnetizing. Guys fighting over her attention, asking me where had she been till now. They didn't see her eyes. They didn't know her personality. Hungry male egos fighting over her beauty. Just her presence. "Where has she been all these years?" - I heard this too many times. As she was dancing, I watched her. The male shallowness begged for her company. Her eyes begged to forget.

Broken dreams, broken heart, broken soul. Twinkling eyes, happy looking face, smiling lips. Painful reality of many lives. Sensitive people are the most genuine and honest people you will ever meet. There is nothing they won’t tell you about themselves if they trust your kindness. However, the moment you betray them, reject them or devalue them, they become the worse type of person. Unfortunately, they end up hurting themselves in the long run. They don’t want to hurt other people. It is against their very nature. They want to make amends and undo the wrong they did. Their life is a wave of highs and lows. They live with guilt and constant pain over unresolved situations and misunderstandings. They are tortured souls that are not able to live with hatred or being hated. This type of person needs the most love anyone can give them because their soul has been constantly bruised by others. However, despite the tragedy of what they have to go through in life, they remain the most compassionate people worth knowing, and the ones that often become activists for the broken hearted, forgotten and the misunderstood. They are angels with broken wings that only fly when loved. That's why she was enjoying the attention. 

Who fixes broken people? Is it only other broken people, ones who've already been ruined? And do we need to be fixed? It was the messiness and hurt in our pasts that drove us, and that same hurt connected us at a sub-dermal level, the kind of scars written so deeply in your cells that you can't even see them anymore, only recognize them in someone else. Behind these eyes there is a girl trapped within her pain – a girl feeling all the emotions of anger and sadness. She’s fighting for a way out.  

She is a beautiful soul. A soul broken in million pieces and brought back together. And her light still beams. Cause the broken souls are the most beautiful ones, once you get to know their story.

Her story...was told by her eyes.

Fall in love with me

If you are going to fall in love with me,

don't fall in love with my Sunday best,

after spending hours getting ready

and have had many hours getting rest.

Fall in love with my body, the way

it widens quite a lot around my hips,

don't fall in love with my done hair

and make up on my face and red lips.

Fall in love with my imperfections,

my impatience, jealousy and joyfulness

my carelessness and my affections,

my maturity and my pointlessness.

Fall in love with my scars, my marks

and all the things that make me complete

fall in love with how my eyes spark,

when I am happy, smiled and upbeat.

Fall in love with every part of me, good or bad,

and especially with all I consider my flaw

fall in love with me when I am blue and sad

fall in love with me as a whole

or don't fall in love with me at all!

The aftereffect of our bodies intertwined

The only way to kill my demons from the past

Darling, be a good boy and bring me a glass

fill it with wine and pour some memories in

from those I've so long kept deep within me.

Let's not talk about it, it's a sad sad story

and I'll be alright, you don't have to worry

just bring your sweet self right next to me

we don't have to talk, that's already agreed.

We have to work together, just follow my lead

you have to kiss everywhere that I bleed

you have to pet everywhere that it hurts

you have to caress as I assert.

In the spirit of honesty, I visually enjoy you

and that's all there is to it, I know you knew.

let's make this night just count for pleasure

no weighing feelings, no measures.

Just you and me, honey, that's all I need

to kill this anguish that I for so long breed

you need someone just for tonight

I need someone just as quite.

Now, baby, please don't be shy

it's just you, me and the dark sky

I've broken down without a reason

that's alright, I've conquered my demons.

The night ends, the dawn is nigh

We've done it, the demons died.

As we said 'no strings attached'

It is clear we are a no-match.

Goodbye now, goodbye my friend,

this is how our story will end.

Until the next time I need a glass of wine

and the aftereffect of our bodies intertwined.

I confess

He. Indefinite source of my torments.

Sweet decadence within all its intents.

I catch myself daydreaming

of our two bodies teaming.

Every drip and every drop

on my skin that slowly lops

of candy coated tongue caress

and I confess, I'm obsessed.

A thousand times do I envision

a beaming, gleaming, dreaming vision

of two bodies, skin to skin

of two souls, sin to sin.

And it never seems to come to an end

this daydream of mine that I pretend

to be real, as I watch you from afar

what I wish we were and what we are.

Two lost souls, two simple beings

is what the others may be seeing,

but we know from the look in our eyes

there is a crave, a thirst in the rise.

Through the layers we see the bare

and we see the crave the other bears

for it's energy it barely holds inside

our worlds shook with the same vibe.

It only takes for a one small touch

to realize the tension we feel so much

uncover our desire we so want to hide

save ourselves from this bide.

But we are strangers, just passing by

everyday, it becomes my why;

to conquer our desire, satisfy the lust

take the risk of loving, we must.

He. Indefinite source of my torments.

Sweet decadence within all its intents.

I catch myself daydreaming

of our two bodies teaming.

Every drip and every drop

on my skin that slowly lops

of candy coated tongue caress

and I confess, I'm obsessed.

Stilettos on the pillowcase

It's these cold late nights

that I treasure dimmed lights

soft warm breath on my neck

in love soaking my back.

Baby, not too often do I tell

what there is in my thoughts well

believe me, such a feels mess

not leaving me any rest.

My stilettos become heavy

and the admiration levy

of this Greek body that you wear

and your scent in mid air.

My body marked with your lips

and nails scratching my hips

losing my breath, and my mind,

and myself, as you grind.

Every little inch of my skin

longs for this sweet sin

and the shape your body makes

right next to me, on this pillowcase.

Baby, like a roller-coaster ride

like the ocean's last tide

love can leave you quiet, if it takes a notion

but tonight, baby, it was an explosion.

Our breathing syncs its pace

slowly this becomes a race

reaching for the top of the world

as it all becomes sweaty and blurred.

A heart beating stardust

There is a saying that I've heard a long time ago: “And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” And whenever I wished something really hard, I reminded myself of this saying. This, as well, complies with my personal believe that if you do good, good will be done to you. If you send positive energy, positive energy comes back your way. Sometimes, I do a random act of kindness, as all of you do and it feels great. No matter how small the gist is, it still counts. Be it holding the door for your neighbor, or feeding the cat that's always in front of your building, or giving your seat to an elderly person on the bus, or just helping that person that slipped or dropped their things in the middle of the street. How warm does your heart feel when they smile at you and say thank you? 

I have said it before, I'll say it one more time: I believe all people are good and beautiful in their own way. You know, we all came in this world in the same way. And we are leaving it the same way. What most of us don't realize is that we are all the same. We are all souls given a body as a tool to go through this journey called life. And our bodies, they are all made of stardust.

The amazing thing is that every atom in your body came from a star that exploded. And, the atoms in your left hand probably came from a different star than your right hand. It really is the most poetic thing I know about physics: You are all stardust. You couldn't be here if stars hadn't exploded, because the elements - the carbon, nitrogen, oxygen, iron, all the things that matter for evolution - weren't created at the beginning of time. They were created in the nuclear furnaces of stars, and the only way they could get into your body is if those stars were kind enough to explode. You are stardust.

And the promise of a day that's shiny new only a dreamer could afford this point of view. You are the Universe and there isn't anything you can't do. If you can picture it, you can achieve it. You are a winner, that is why you are here, on this planet, to win your life. We are limited, not by our abilities, but by our vision. You gotta have a big vision to know what your abilities are. Don't be afraid. Fear limits you. It's okay to dream and dream big. Don't just exist. Live. Thrive. Love. Share. Care. DARE!

Cause there, in your chest, there is a heart beating stardust.

I promise you one thing

Feel like writing a post. I couldn't come up with a topic, so I just decided to start and see where it takes me. It's always been like that. Even when I was in primary school and got an assignment for my literature class, I wouldn't exactly know how my essay would go. I would just start and then let my pen lead the way. At times I would get confused and start all over again and at times I would just go on and on until I was pleased with what I've written. And most of the times when I didn't know how to start and just went with it, turned out to be my best essays, like you wouldn't believe. What it only takes is to just start. And don't give up. Either go on until you are satisfied, or start all over again.

It's the same with life. Why do we get so disappointed? Why do we give up? It's not like it'll change by itself. We gotta work on it. Like on an essay. Even if you think there is no time and the deadline is near, you can do it. How many nights you finished a masterpiece in just a few hours before it was due? Funny thing, this brain of ours. It can make wonders if we only let it.

It's the same with life. Why not continue to grow and develop until we are satisfied? You failed and you quit? Why not continue and see where it takes you? It might be some new experience, a new way to handle things. It may open your horizons and make you see the thing from another perspective.

It is the same. You tried and failed and that's it? Why not just try one more time. Maybe this is the time when you get it right. Or the time after that. You feel like you have exhausted all your options and you just give in. Start all over again. And then again. And again. It takes many times, but when you make it right, you know it and you feel accomplished. You feel free.

I'll make this one short. I obviously wanted to convey a message to all of you out there. Just like a paper due tomorrow, where you gotta work smart to finish it, work with life. It might cut a few hours short on your sleep, but it'll be worth it. Keep going and never give up. Or start all over again and never give up.

If you are seeking for someone else's approval, don't. If you are out for recognition, don't be. The only person that should approve your actions is no one else, but you. The only person that you should seek recognition from is yourself. And until you are satisfied with yourself, until you give yourself that recognition that means so much to you, don't stop. Keep going. One step at a time. You'll get there, I promise.

When galaxies collide

Face to face, eyes to eyes

A soft sigh, no more whys

Lips tremble, whispering shy

One look, dawn is nigh.

Moonlit skin as bathed in silver

from the brisk draft bodies shiver

praising your masculinity

indulgence in infinity.

Without words I use  

my tongue to tell the tale of us

Anticipating the fuse

creating the emotion fuss.

Tracing your shadowscape

in all its divinity

and there is no escape 

from all this affinity.

Molded by your fingers

a musk scent that lingers

all over this body of mine

a leniency, a fine wine.

With the first sight of dawn

you know, my soul is your pawn

and right here, on this bedside

is where galaxies collide.